Not me! Monday

EDIT to add more to the bottom of the list

Much has occurred since the last Not me! Monday Post.  Many things, I have [thankfully] forgotten about.  However a few were too memorable to forget and those will be my material for this episode of 'Not me! Monday'.

  • This week, while at my favorite restaurant in Wichita I did NOT fear being thrown out, because of my children's behavior.  
  • My youngest was an angel, and played quietly, never crying, throwing fits, whining or screaming loud enough to make you cringe.  
  • My eldest child also behaved accordingly.  I did not have to witness him take a full glass of Dr. Pepper, and, with the ease of a life-long bartender, slide it 4 feet down the table and off onto the floor.  
  • I did not then proceed to slightly freak out, having been on the edge of losing it already with the aforementioned childs actions.  
  • I did not make eye contact with the multiple other patrons who turned to see what crashed, who gasped and who was growling through gritted teeth at a child who was instantly proclaiming apologies.  
  • I did not make reference to wishing I liked alcohol, at that moment, while sopping up the pop and sorting ice from chards of glass.  
And that was all in one meal.  SO glad that wasn't me.

  • I do not still have a few dirty dishes on the dining room table from dinner tonight, and more on the kitchen counter because I neglected them to start this blog post a few hours early.  
  • While on the waiting end of a ringing phone this week, I did not accidently say to a friends husband  "You look amazing!" - intending to answer my 3 year old instead.  
  •  My youngest child did not stick both his hands into the toilet at church Sunday night, and then proceed to suck on the sleeves of his sweater.  That would be unbearably gross and I would never EVER admit that it happened, if it did.
  • My husband did not compare me to a drug addict today, because of a whiny, temper-tantrum-like conversation about needing a Pop.  I did not reward myself with a piece of chocolate in an effort to self-soothe.
  • I did not spot my 3 year old pick his nose then EAT it from across the church foyer today. I did not (jokingly) threaten to cut his finger off if he ever did that in front of people again.
Newly added:
  •  I did not sleep, curled up on a crib mattress on the floor, with a child wrapped around my neck for part of last night.  I don't give in when my baby says "Momma, yay down" and points to his pillow.  Oh and, btw, my kids don't sleep on mattresses on the floor of OUR bedroom, either.  They have their own separate beds, in their own room, that each stays in all night long.  
  • Being full of resoluteness, I have not almost called the cable company back about 5 times to CANCEL the removal of all television from our house.  I am not secretly hoping they put off showing up today. 
I think I love Not me! Monday because it reminds me that I'm not the only one.  Don't let me down girlies! Let's hear your Not me's - post a comment here if you do a NmM.


Brianna said...

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your not me's! :o)

Carey-Life in the Carpool Lane said...

Great list! I feel for you in that restaurant. My two boys are perfect angels whenever we go out (NOT)! I have never wanted to request a margarita in the midst of a family meal (NOT)!

I'm going to go check out a couple more of your posts...
Thanks for visiting my blog!