Not me! Monday

Time again for NOT me! Monday. I'm not perfect - and it feels good to say so.

Even though I have been fighting a particularly nasty cold since Friday morning, I certainly did NOT wake up this morning with 'unpleasantness' on my face, that precipitated from my own nose. I did not tell my husband about it later in the morning causing him to become COMPLETELY grossed out. You know, since he never does gross things. I do not plan to sleep tonight with a tissue shoved into my nostril to prevent such events from occurring again.

I did NOT just write that. My husband is going to scold me for that later, guaranteed.

As I type, I am not hiding behind my laptop, cowering at the sounds of Heroes on the TV. I'm no chicken. I enjoy adding stress and drama to my life via fictional characters. Because I don't have enough stress of my own.

I didn't call my husband earlier today and then suddenly have no words, because I was doped up on Sudafed and couldn't think of why I called him.

I did not send my 3 year old to preschool this morning without breakfast, because I am tired of force feeding him something OTHER than Captain Crunch. I always enforce the rules and good eating habits. I didn't give both boys hot chocolate first thing either. Oh - AND, I also certainly did not make 7 layer taco dip FOR DINNER, and let my children eat as many chips as they wanted.

I didn't think multiple curse words while trying to accomplish ALL my wrapping in one sitting tonight. Everything always works as simply as it's supposed to. This was not followed by a mini-breakdown (like 3 tears, MAYBE) over how bad my presents will look compared to everyone else's. That is silly and ridiculous.

Finally, despite having been home for ALL day, I do NOT have a counter full of dirty dishes, a Papasan full of unfolded laundry, and a tub full of paperwork that I should be going through. I do NOT blame it all on the medicine & head cold. ALL of it.

Whew - well! Glad that's not my life. :-)


Tricia said...

loved the post!! great way to end my day!

chad said...

I love you no matter what! Thanks for making me laugh this morning.

Jaime said...

LOL.... Too funny!