Ah, NmM, how I've missed you! I have certainly amassed a plethora of embarrassing interesting stories that could fill this blog to the brim, however my ability to recall is only so-so. To that end here we have the comeback episode of Not me! Monday:
1. I have not had multiple Chocolate/Dr. Pepper Binges over these last few weeks due to the stress of packing/moving/finding a house. I did not in fact, order 2 dozen of "God's favorite cupcakes" during one such meltdown Thursday. I have not had 1 for breakfast everyday since, nor have I partaken of the raspberry-cream-filled goodness each night before bed. I have WAY more self-control than that.
2. Speaking of house hunting, I did not completely abuse my Mom/Dad/Stepdad (all 3 realtors) during our last 2-3 visits to Wichita to get into upwards of 90 houses, none which suit me. I also did not encounter the following items in said various houses: feces (various sizes and conditions - from 'fresh' to fermented), large puddles of water (INSIDE), and the LARGEST pile of toenail clippings that has ever been amassed. Oh yes - it was uber gross.
3. Last Monday morning I did not try to scramble to finish my 3 year old's preschool "homework" (a weather map that was to be worked on everyday, and then turned in) only to realize that it's nowhere to be found. I did not make him sit down with me and DRAW the weather for each of the 20 days on a piece of paper instead. After sending him on his merry way I did not turn around and SEE the stupid original map laying on the counter.
4. While dismantling our old bed, I did not find a cable bill between the bed and the wall. From 2005. Nope - not me! I keep meticulous records, always.
5. I did not come home tonight to experience 'that smell'. You know which smell I'm referring to. The one that smacks you in the face right when you walk in the back door and your eyes start to water? Nope - not here. I certainly did not empty the fridge of rotten strawberries and dump cantaloupe rinds into the trash this morning and then forget all about them until I got home tonight. Phew! That would be gross.
6. I have not been (apparently) exceedingly irritable this past week, and if I were it certainly is not because my house looks like 2 tiny tornados blew through here. After growling and snapping at the boys tonight I had to go apologize to my children: "Mommy is sorry for being grouchy to you today, do you forgive me?" I did not hear my 3 year old innocently respond: "But mom, aren't you grouchy all of the days?"
7. I have not been so scatterbrained that I actually FORGOT to pick up my child from MOPS and tried to leave without him. (Luckily for me I was without a vehicle of my own, so I realized my error while waiting for my husband to pick me up.) It did not take me a good 5 minutes before I remembered.
Okay - I think that's about all the honesty I can stand for one day! Enjoy laughing at my misfortune/misdeeds and I will do the same for you... :-)
2 comments:
found you on mckmama's site and really did laugh... funny stuff. #6 is my favorite i think ;)
Your not really grouchy all the days. I promise.
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